Year One.
It has been over a year since I have written; although, it feels like yesterday. It's as if I have hit the fast forward button, and time is flying by. My last entry was getting ready for the arrival of our little miracle, and now today marks the eve of Livie June's first birthday. The journey of praying for her felt like an eternity; yet I am struggling to hold onto every single second of her first year. It has been a year of many many "firsts" and by far the best year of our lives. There are times we look at her and still cannot believe she is here and that she's ours. We thank Jesus every day for choosing us to be her Mommy and Daddy. Our love for her is unconditional and unfailing.
I have thought about writing this blog entry for a while now- what I would write, what words would come to mind, etc. I decided that this one would be for Livie. Maybe one day she will read it and get a look into the life of us as her parents during this season of our lives. I have never shared Livie's birth story (the original is quite long so I'm going to leave out some details), but here's a little glimpse into our amazing day 365 days ago. This one is for you my sweet girl.
Dear my sweet Livie June,
Today is the eve of your first birthday. A whole year has past since you made your dramatic debut into this world. A full 365 days of pure joy has filled our hearts. Nearly one year ago today you decided you wanted to come 4 weeks early... at 4:00AM you decided it was time to start that process. While I had Daddy ironing "going-home" outfits and getting last minute bags together I was just taking it all in. He was frantic, and I was still trying to figure out if I was having contractions. Many people told me that I would know when it was time. Well... I did not. I had no idea what contractions felt like so I wasn't really sure if it was time. Within 30 minutes that all changed because wow did I know! We rushed to the hospital around 5:00AM, and my contractions were about 4 minutes apart during that drive. Your Daddy drove REALLY fast. By the time we made it to the hospital I was measuring 6.5 centimeters... meaning you were coming fast, and within 20 minutes of being there I was at 10.5 centimeters. Now might be a good time to let you know my pain tolerance is around a zero, and I have always been the one who requests the good meds. At that point I had zero meds, and I'm pretty sure the event in that following 30 minutes was similar to a clip in the movie "The Exorcist." The doctors then explained to me that it may be too late for the epidural. I can't even begin to tell you the thoughts that raced through my mind at that point. With enough begging and pleading (and screaming) we tried one more time, and by the grace of God I was able to get that epidural. And it turns out that it was a good thing I did get it because your stubborn little self decided you wanted to make your entry "sunny-side up" as they call it which means it was more difficult to deliver. After nearly 4 hours of pushing we called it quits and decided that a c-section was the appropriate way to go. Even that procedure took a while because you were stuck, and they had to take their time getting you out. What we thought was going to be super fast and quick turned into a very long & tiresome day. I was physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. At 2:35PM on January 5th, 2017 this wrinkly 6lb 15 oz cone-head smooshy face little girl entered the world. The moment I heard you cry... that one moment took my breath away. It was worth every single season of waiting and every single struggle & heartache over the past 4 years we had been through. I cried- we all cried. That moment changed our whole lives forever.
I kept my emotions mostly intact during our hospital stay. We were just so happy. It wasn't until the nurse was wheeling me outside with you (in the carseat) in my lap that I lost it. I saw Steven driving the car around, and tears poured down my face. I saw the concern in his eyes when he got out of the car. He asked, "What is wrong?!" I said, "I just cannot believe this is happening. We're taking a baby home." It hit me all at once that you were finally here. Our little miracle was finally going home with us, and our prayers had been answered.
From the moment you entered this world you have brought us unexplainable joy. From the dimples on your tiny hands and toes to the extra rolls on your ankles, wrists, and thighs... we love every part of you and have since we first held you. Those days in the hospital were some of the best of my life. I don't know if it was because you were such a good newborn or if we were just so in shock that you were here, but those days & nights... I soaked up every minute. The same went for those first weeks of your life... even the sleepless nights in the beginning. I remember one night in particular that you were crying, and I just woke up to rock you. Steven woke and asked if everything was okay, and my response was "I just love her so much." I think that's why those first months went so well... we were just so in love and so thankful we had you that the lack of sleep never crossed our minds. That same love has overflowed all throughout your little life thus far- even now as you stand below me trying to pull the screen down off of my laptop. You just make me smile, and you bring my heart so much joy.
You've had many "firsts" this year! Your first (and last) circus at just 4 weeks old, road trips to Alabama, Georgia, Florida, North Carolina, and Tennessee, Disney World, family beach trips, countless first events & holidays, first Alabama football game, hayrides & pony rides, pumpkin patches, train rides, meeting Santa Claus (x4), and all the fun firsts in between! We have done a lot with you in your first year, and we wouldn't have changed a thing! We LOVE taking you places with us. It is truly our favorite thing to do.
I want you to know that you are so loved. You have met so many people that prayed for you long before you entered this world. They have loved on you, prayed over you, and for some you have been a reminder that God is still at work. You truly are a miracle Livie June, and I pray every day that you will spread God's love where ever you go whether it be through your words, your smile, or your actions. I believe that He took His time creating you because you are meant to do great things.
This first year with you has by far been the best year of my life. I am sure I will say that same thing next year because I know it will only get better with you. Your personality is really starting to shine through, and my goodness you are such a little stinker already. You make us laugh so much with your giggles and your two-teeth grin. Our hearts are so full. As much as it saddens me putting your outgrown clothes away or putting away the baby essentials it brings me so much joy that I get to watch you grow. It is such a bittersweet feeling because I will miss the first year so much, but I look forward to all that lies ahead. It's going to be a great adventure with you, and I am so thankful that I get to be on the front row. So happy year one my girl. My baby is a one year old. I love you to the moon and back Livie June.
Love,
Mommy
I have thought about writing this blog entry for a while now- what I would write, what words would come to mind, etc. I decided that this one would be for Livie. Maybe one day she will read it and get a look into the life of us as her parents during this season of our lives. I have never shared Livie's birth story (the original is quite long so I'm going to leave out some details), but here's a little glimpse into our amazing day 365 days ago. This one is for you my sweet girl.
Dear my sweet Livie June,
Today is the eve of your first birthday. A whole year has past since you made your dramatic debut into this world. A full 365 days of pure joy has filled our hearts. Nearly one year ago today you decided you wanted to come 4 weeks early... at 4:00AM you decided it was time to start that process. While I had Daddy ironing "going-home" outfits and getting last minute bags together I was just taking it all in. He was frantic, and I was still trying to figure out if I was having contractions. Many people told me that I would know when it was time. Well... I did not. I had no idea what contractions felt like so I wasn't really sure if it was time. Within 30 minutes that all changed because wow did I know! We rushed to the hospital around 5:00AM, and my contractions were about 4 minutes apart during that drive. Your Daddy drove REALLY fast. By the time we made it to the hospital I was measuring 6.5 centimeters... meaning you were coming fast, and within 20 minutes of being there I was at 10.5 centimeters. Now might be a good time to let you know my pain tolerance is around a zero, and I have always been the one who requests the good meds. At that point I had zero meds, and I'm pretty sure the event in that following 30 minutes was similar to a clip in the movie "The Exorcist." The doctors then explained to me that it may be too late for the epidural. I can't even begin to tell you the thoughts that raced through my mind at that point. With enough begging and pleading (and screaming) we tried one more time, and by the grace of God I was able to get that epidural. And it turns out that it was a good thing I did get it because your stubborn little self decided you wanted to make your entry "sunny-side up" as they call it which means it was more difficult to deliver. After nearly 4 hours of pushing we called it quits and decided that a c-section was the appropriate way to go. Even that procedure took a while because you were stuck, and they had to take their time getting you out. What we thought was going to be super fast and quick turned into a very long & tiresome day. I was physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. At 2:35PM on January 5th, 2017 this wrinkly 6lb 15 oz cone-head smooshy face little girl entered the world. The moment I heard you cry... that one moment took my breath away. It was worth every single season of waiting and every single struggle & heartache over the past 4 years we had been through. I cried- we all cried. That moment changed our whole lives forever.
I kept my emotions mostly intact during our hospital stay. We were just so happy. It wasn't until the nurse was wheeling me outside with you (in the carseat) in my lap that I lost it. I saw Steven driving the car around, and tears poured down my face. I saw the concern in his eyes when he got out of the car. He asked, "What is wrong?!" I said, "I just cannot believe this is happening. We're taking a baby home." It hit me all at once that you were finally here. Our little miracle was finally going home with us, and our prayers had been answered.
From the moment you entered this world you have brought us unexplainable joy. From the dimples on your tiny hands and toes to the extra rolls on your ankles, wrists, and thighs... we love every part of you and have since we first held you. Those days in the hospital were some of the best of my life. I don't know if it was because you were such a good newborn or if we were just so in shock that you were here, but those days & nights... I soaked up every minute. The same went for those first weeks of your life... even the sleepless nights in the beginning. I remember one night in particular that you were crying, and I just woke up to rock you. Steven woke and asked if everything was okay, and my response was "I just love her so much." I think that's why those first months went so well... we were just so in love and so thankful we had you that the lack of sleep never crossed our minds. That same love has overflowed all throughout your little life thus far- even now as you stand below me trying to pull the screen down off of my laptop. You just make me smile, and you bring my heart so much joy.
You've had many "firsts" this year! Your first (and last) circus at just 4 weeks old, road trips to Alabama, Georgia, Florida, North Carolina, and Tennessee, Disney World, family beach trips, countless first events & holidays, first Alabama football game, hayrides & pony rides, pumpkin patches, train rides, meeting Santa Claus (x4), and all the fun firsts in between! We have done a lot with you in your first year, and we wouldn't have changed a thing! We LOVE taking you places with us. It is truly our favorite thing to do.
I want you to know that you are so loved. You have met so many people that prayed for you long before you entered this world. They have loved on you, prayed over you, and for some you have been a reminder that God is still at work. You truly are a miracle Livie June, and I pray every day that you will spread God's love where ever you go whether it be through your words, your smile, or your actions. I believe that He took His time creating you because you are meant to do great things.
This first year with you has by far been the best year of my life. I am sure I will say that same thing next year because I know it will only get better with you. Your personality is really starting to shine through, and my goodness you are such a little stinker already. You make us laugh so much with your giggles and your two-teeth grin. Our hearts are so full. As much as it saddens me putting your outgrown clothes away or putting away the baby essentials it brings me so much joy that I get to watch you grow. It is such a bittersweet feeling because I will miss the first year so much, but I look forward to all that lies ahead. It's going to be a great adventure with you, and I am so thankful that I get to be on the front row. So happy year one my girl. My baby is a one year old. I love you to the moon and back Livie June.
Love,
Mommy
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